Montrose, PA

Best definition
Montrose, PA
A quiet little town with cute little shops and a low crime rate. People complain about what Montrose has to

offer, but never mention the fact it is conveniently located 20 minutes from Binghamton, New York and 30 minutes from Scranton, Pennsylvania. Montrose is a great place to raise a family. It is a secure, safe town with friendly people and barely any traffic. Montrose has low pollution rates, trails to bike or hike, lakes, a great outdoors scene in general, and many little festivals like the Blueberry Festival and the Chocolate and Wine festival. The only downfall of Montrose are the young haters who think they belong in Cali ( more like Jersey). If they don’t like Montrose, then leave. Surprise surprise, they can’t, because they wasted their highschool education getting drunk, getting high, getting abortions, and writing bunk rhymes. Or, they are just plan lazy.

Montrose, PA is the perfect place to raise a family. It is nestled inbetween two cities, and people who work hard either towards a satisfying career or towards an education can find jobs in areas with a low cost of living. Montrose has a lot to offer if you have a little imagination and a little bit of energy.

Overall, Montrose is a nice town with nice people, but everywhere you go you will run into the occasionally “my life sucks because of Montrose, not because I’m a loser.”

(i.e the previous definition about Montrose was written by one of these haters who probably can’t remember the last time they read a book)

Montrose, PA: define #2
Montrose, PA
Basically Montrose is just some tiny town like 20 minutes South of actual Hell on Earth (aka Binghamton NY). The town is full of old bastards with beer bellies and 16 year old stoners who will literally go nowhere in life. The Montrose School District is also so freaking large in radius, it can take over an hour to get to a friend’s house in the district. To make the school district even worse, tey usually win about two football games a season. Going to Montrose is one hell of a gamble, mostly because you’ll either feel the urge to buy a pair of hunting boots you’ll NEVER use, or you’ll be baked like a f*cking cake and youll end up moving to Montrose, therefore ruining your life. Don’t worry though, Montrose is so small you’d miss it if you weren’t paying attention. Basically, just stay the f*ck away from Montrose!
God, I have to go see my family that lives in Montrose, PA

Well, since you’ll be there, can you find me some good drugs?
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