of November, July, and April, except on the third saturday of said months. If this Saturday should occur to have a friday in the same month after the event, a festival will be held, and you muct take a photograph of yourself in a chicken suit if you cannot attend. If you misspell ‘majiks’ to the common ‘magicks’ you will most likely be called a weiner, because you are not a very good pirate.
No single person can define who has majiks, it must be held before a council of elders, a minimum of 8. If a person boasts publically about having majiks of any sort, they may be executed (banned) before a large audience, and ridiculed to hearts content.
Do you have the majiks I asked for?
I wouldn’t touch that majiks if I were you, it might explode.
Dude 1: You’re a fucking nerd, how did you manage to sleep with the hottest girl in school?
Dude 2: Fucking Majik!
Dude 1: Fuckin’…
Trust me, it is spelled magic. All this magick crap was fine in the 1800s maybe, but we have moved on since, and majik is totally unacceptable, pretentious and stupid spelling for the word.